When it comes to choosing a new computer or device you can easily spend hours pouring over the minute details of long specification lists. “This one has 400,001 pixel whereas this other one has 400,002.” Which is great, until you start waking up from restless sleeps over and over again, asking yourself in a panic “Do I really need that extra pixel?” Sometimes the specs aren’t as important as some more practical aspects such as how the device fits in with the flow of your life. That’s why it’s important to consider Digital Feng Shui.
We’ve been having to hit buttons to get machines to do things since the industrial revolution. The problem with keyboard/mouse combination is that they can be crawling with dirt and bacteria but look perfectly normal, causing you to touch who knows what when you just want to open your email browser. Thankfully, with touch screen technology the slightest touch from a greasy finger can not only be seen, it completely obscures your view of the screen, meaning you’ll make sure your hands are clean and your device sanitised just so you can see what your doing.
But even touch screens seem archaic these days. Should you really have to touch things anymore? If I can’t just wave my hand at the device like an emperor whose divine power precludes me from sullying my hands, then I don’t want to know about it. Fortunately hand gesture technology could soon replace the mouse, and infrared virtual keyboards can finally let us all take the leap into looking like mental patients while we read wikipedia articles.
Being portable is the main strength of tablets and smartphones, but if you require the raw power of a desktop then you only really have one choice; make your desktop portable.
All you need to do this is a car battery, a car power inverter and large sack and you’re all set. If you lack the upper body strength to lug your desktop around in a sack on your back, all you have to do is find yourself a discarded shopping trolley, connect it up and your desktop is now as portable as can be with your monitor fitting handily in the fold out baby seat. If you’re looking to turn heads at your next business meeting, this is the way to do it.
Pro Tip: Steal a trolley from a name brand supermarket in an middle to upper class suburb. As trolley with a shonky wheel may adversely affect mouse control.
When it comes to smartphones there are now so many options available in terms of screen size that you really need an algorithm to figure it out for you or you may get one of the factors confused such as whether to use mean or median when calculating your average pocket size for maximum accessibility. This can be disastrous because when a friend does something stupid, because you need to have the confidence that you can draw your device out of your pocket in less time than it takes them to realise how silly they look. Every second counts!
On portable devices, large onboard data storage can sometimes double the price. Cloud storage can be a solution if you have the mobile data plan to handle it, but sometimes you will have to make the hard choices. Do you really need to keep all 7 seasons of Lost in High Definition on your phone just in case you suddenly get the urge to watch it on the bus?
When intel releases their computer processors which currently power most PCs, they come in a range of qualities just like cars, there’s the Hyundai’s, (i3’s ) reliable get the job done types. Then there’s the BMW(i5’s), a bit more powerful, a smoother experience and a bit of self indulgent smug bragging rights. Then there’s the Ferrari; with the top of the line engine under the hood, that can go so fast you can’t really use it to it’s full potential on normal information superhighways, and which also lets everyone know that you’re probably over compensating for something.
So choosing the right one for it’s intended use should be the main consideration. If you only plan to do word processing and watch youtube videos, you may not need to buy the latest generation core i7. But if you do have have extra unused processing speed you can always donate it to some worthwhile causes such as FightAids.
So next time your partners sibling starts to get smug at the family barbecue talking about their recent trip to Africa to help feed starving children you’ll have an ace in the hole.
The CRT monitor is dead. It may seem bad for the environment to throw your 17” monitor that served you so well since the first Gulf War, but there is no point buying a new computer if the interface you look at to use it looks exactly the same running DOS as it does windows 8.
If you’re looking for a cinema experience from your computer monitor then 3D is the way to go. You haven’t really experienced the web until you’ve trawled through Gumtree in 3D, it’s like the second hand microwaves and old coffee tables are coming right at you.